Muffled Tones on Broken Radios

All the rambling in my head shared with those who listen

Hey! When is it too late for dinner?

There are a lot of entrenched formalities in the decisions we forgot were made more than a generation ago. The right hour or the right spices, how exactly the setting shifts from pain to pleasure.

The natural timing fits perfectly in an unbalanced rhythm. Holy prayer full of grace or staying up a little late to catch the Simpsons before bed’s embrace. Boundaries are never clear, but the topic shines brightly in its crystalized reflections.

Food and meals framed by wherever they decide to settle.

Dinnertime Discussions

I held the first real-time virtual meet-up for Maneus last week. A lot of overly complicated words to say a few people gathered to chat.

Now, I’m not delusional and mention too often how I’m well aware that my story may be difficult for some to get into. I’ve said this so many times it should also be obvious I suffer from that old creator’s curse.

I expect everyone to hate my work. I am constantly fighting nightmares of my own making that scream “you’re not good enough.”

—That I will never achieve my goal or even unravel a single moment of respite, entertainment, or satisfaction.

O woe is me to see what I’ve seen.

Or maybe feel what I’ve felt and write what I’ve written.

So even though it was a small gathering, anyone joining to hear what I have to say was a victory. Not just for my own self-esteem and self-worth, but for gaining an invaluable opportunity to listen to the thoughts my story sparked.

To understand both what people enjoyed and what they struggled to accept.

Curious Quotes

I’m happy to report that generally people found Book I entertaining. I may have dived head first into the deep end, but it was still serviceably readable and reliably entertaining.

I’ve mentioned before, but when I started rewriting everything I really wanted to find a way to keep the original ideas with all their surreal strangeness, while also providing a clearer structure and easier to follow plot.

Perhaps as a counter to my own fears, I was told over and over that the pacing was never too slow. I’m still willing to bet that may only become an honest opinion after digging down further into the story.

Regardless of my own self-doubt and my lack of self-confidence, the conversations continued toward ever more interesting subjects.

@mobiuscoffeeShort recap of the first Maneus book club meet-up! #booktok #writingcommunity #writing #book #bookclub #philosophy #fyp #novel #fypシ

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One topic in particular I enjoyed was that of Maneus as a person. In Book I, he’s far from a typical hero. The tired man is simply the owner of a run-down store looking to coast for the rest of his life.

When I brought up those ideas and how they relate to his actions, the answers were unanimous in his description as a good person.

Rather than apathetic, Maneus is stoic.

He may show disinterest, but he also defends his family with his own life. The all consuming rage in his soul is not his fault and even provides the strength to take on the greatest challenge of his life and the next.

Thematic Threads

Maneus the book is more than its titular character though. I was also happy to discuss the overarching themes of Book I and its surreal philosophy-as-a-stage-play format.

Nothing stood out more - at least for me - than the idea of the radio. The sound coming from behind the counter is a constant, but it’s left to our ears to imagine what everyone is listening to.

However, I wanted my odd quotes opening every chapter to serve that exact purpose. My explanations acting as more than just a framing device, they were the sound of what everyone was listening to as they waited for closing time.

That thought then continues with the way those words move from the introduction to the meat of the story. The text itself floats from present tenses in a chaotic flurry of vague and abstract time before transitioning into the oasis of Maneus and his corner store.

Everything shifts as the narration is relegated to the past tense and we enter a moment of discrete countable hours. A core memory from Maneus’ past.

A window into how he built a refuge in an otherwise doomed setting. In my mind, the perfect location for conversations fueled by cheap cups of coffee.

Rage, regret, good, evil, friendships, loss, and lasting love.

A look into our ultimate end and subdued desire.

I dared to ask if there’s any hope to be found in our deepest despair.

In both the book Maneus and the character Maneus, these themes were meant to be somewhat mild but very strong. The paradox of opposites being an integral part of the whole.

Accepting oneself for who we are, flaws and all.

A Good Story

More than anything, I want Maneus to be a good story. Something people enjoy reading or at least find worthwhile to read.

So I was very concerned about any confusion hiding between the lines. Anything left unclear or unexplored. Anything that made the book worse because I wasn’t a good enough writer.

To my surprise, the outstanding questions were more closely linked to curiosity than confusion.

A few core questions driving everyone to keep reading.

At least for the people who came to the event, they were looking forward to finding resolutions and catharsis in the rest of what remained.

I sincerely hope all of you share that sentiment.

And if perchance you’ve yet to start reading, I can only hope this post gets you gleaning.

Until next time.

Cheers,

John

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